Dirty J Gets Flogged

So last night, we spent literally the entire time in class berating this one guy who'd just recently gotten out of jail for violating his release agreement. Apparently, his wife wasn't allowed to see his kids, and he wasn't allowed to see his wife; and one day DHS (Department of Human Services, I think) showed up at his house unexpectedly when his wife was over at his house watching his kids while he was at work. So long story short; he went to jail, and had just gotten released a few days before showing up to class.
So, Todd was put in the unfortunate position of having to evaluate this guy for DHS and tell them whether or not he should be around his kids or get unification with his wife. Since the whole idea behind this program is that you learn to take responsibility for your actions, Todd decided to put this guy's feet to the fire and see if he'd take responsibility for everything he'd done that got him to this point. He put the guy, that I'll call Dirty J, in a chair at the front of the class, and gave us a little background.
Todd told us that this guy had been in the program for over thirty weeks before Todd became his facilitator. Almost as soon as Dirty J was Todd's problem, DHS asked Todd for an evaluation. Todd went to the other facilitators who'd worked with him and asked them what their opinion of Dirty J was, and they all said that this guy wasn't really progressing, mostly he just came to class with a chip on his shoulder and put in his time. They said he didn't really take responsibility for his actions, and always had someone to blame for whatever problems he has.
Well, sitting in front of all of us Todd asks Dirty J to tell us about his time in the program. Right off the bat, I'm thinking this guy is full of it. He begins by telling us how intellectual he is, and that he was totally detaching himself from his emotions and even used his skills in math (what?) to buck the system at Bridges. He must have used the word "intellectualize" seven times in the first two minutes he was talking. Now call me superficial or whatever, but when a dude shows up to class in a dirty brown t-shirt with a faded picture of a Camaro on it, bad facial hair and running pants, the first thing I'm thinking is not: this dude is going to outsmart us all.
So he goes on and on, painting this picture of what a diabolical genius he is, until finally Todd interrupts him. "Why don't you tell us why you're here in the first place?" Todd asks. Dirty J tries to dodge the question for awhile, and then he tells us this story about how he caught his wife cheating on him, and there's no chance here he's not going to parlay this into a story about how fully badass he really is so he tells us about how he totally kicked this guys ass with his Genius Kung Fu, and then three days later he got picked up by the police.
Todd interrupts him again, asking him about why DHS is on his case. Dirty J instantly takes advantage of another opportunity to ignore the question and play up his badassness. He tells us about how he does "Major Event Security" (remind me to put a link to the Mall ninja in here somewhere) and that he works twenty hour days, and he makes a sideways mention that the house went to hell in a hand basket during the two weeks he was working this event. Todd pointedly asks him "What does to hell in a handbasket mean." Dirty J goes, "Well the laundry was piling up and the dishes hadn't been done in a couple of days." That's it, that's all he says.
Todd asks him about the spoon. Dirty J goes "oh," as if he'd forgotten a very insignificant detail "Yeah, they found a spoon in the house that they tested and it turned out to have opiate residue in it." We all jump on this: is it yours? No. Was it your wife's? No, she doens't do drugs. The more questions he gets asked about the spoon, the more he implies that it's some kind of conspiracy. Although he has no shame about telling us all about his "open-ended" prescription to Oxycodone and Morphine, and his lifelong abuse of any and all kinds of opiates, but the spoon wasn't his because he doesn't like needles. Well I think we have the proof we need here, so let's move on.
So, Todd gets frustrated with this dude's obvious denial of the situation. He opens the floor to all of us, actually makes us ask questions about the state of this dude's house. So we start asking questions:
"Was the trash piled up?"
Dirty J, responds "Yeah, the trash probably hadn't been taken out in five days or so"
"Were there clothes piled up everywhere?"
"Well, the laundry hadn't been done in about four or five days"
He keeps reverting back to "five days" I guess he thinks that sounds bad, but still reasonable, and keeps him from looking like a total greasy shitbag.
It gets to me, and I ask "Where were the kids sleeping? Did they have sheets on the beds?"
"In their beds, and yes they had sheets."
The interrogation goes on like this for a little while longer, "Was there rotten food? Was stuff smeared on the walls? How many dirty diapers were there?" Dirty J deflected all of these in the same way. Finally I spoke up, and said "Dude, I don't want to be a dick here, because I know we're all here with our own problems, but I gotta tell you this story; One time when I was in the Army, our Sergeant Major made all of us Sergeants come out to this soldier's house in my unit one weekend. This was our equivalent of a DHS situation. In this soldier's apartment there was shit everywhere, no clothes were hung up, you couldn't see the floor, puddles of random shit everywhere, every flat surface in the house was covered with garbage, food and whatever else, also the house reaked like some kind of otherworldly rotten garbage." And I went on, "like I said, I'm not trying to call you out or anything, but that dude was just like you, when we were talking to him he was like 'yeah, I've been real busy, I didn't really get a chance to clean up around here,' and we were all going nuts saying 'Dude, it doesn't get like this because you forgot to clean up for a few days, this is a lifestyle. A filthy rotten lifestyle."
My little story got Dirty J to change his approach a little, now instead of deflecting he was saying "yeah, I hate myself for letting it get this way," and other wah wah wah I'm a horrible person stuff, probably just to get us to back off. Finally Todd brought out the official DHS report.
After a little back and forth with Dirty J about whether or not he wanted to hear this report, he read it to the class. The DHS report said that there was garbage everywhere, that you couldn't go in the dining room because it was stacked with boxes in disarray. Apparently there was a little bathroom that was piled up with so many clothes you couldn't open the door. In the bedroom where the whole family slept, there were all kinds of bottles and sippy cups with various rotting liquids inside. In the kitchen there were dishes with moldy food piled everywhere, and next to an overflowing trashcan there were piles of garbage bags that hadn't been taken out. The house was infested with fleas, keep in mind that Dirty J said that there weren't any pets in the house, and the kids were covered in flea bites. And finally in another bathroom there was a toilet that was backed up and overflowing for some time, DHS couldn't stay in that area for more than a few minutes at a time.
So it got pretty quiet after that, the killer here is that while we were all sitting there quietly picturing the extent of how bad this house had been, Dirty J seemed to be oddly satisfied, as if what Todd just read had vindicated him.
After everything I've heard in my life, I'm still meeting people who astonish me with their thinking. I guess I'm just not smart enough to understand the mystery that is Dirty J.

One more thing, I want to know what kind of medical condition someone could have that would require an open-ended prescription of morphine and oxycodone, yet still that person holds down a job working twenty hour days doing security. Anyone?