A Good Day Not to Die

Seeing dead people is a part of this job. I think I was pretty prepared for that from the beginning. Being there when they died was harder to deal with. When I was in Iraq and they were just splattered all over the place, it was easier to detach myself from the fact that all that mess was once a person. I haven't been doing this job for very long and I've had my fair share of lost patients.
Tonight I was on a call and when I went in he was awake and talking to me. I was taking his blood pressure and asking him questions when he went out like a light. The team on scene sprung into action, but I have to admit when I was going to work on him that I was thinking "Ah boy, there goes another one."
We went through the whole routine that you always see on TV. We put him down on the floor and I jumped in to do CPR. And I have to say; I fucked him up. If he had one intact rib left after I got done with him, I would be shocked. The other guys took care gettting an EKG and the paddles They shocked him a couple of times while the others pumped him full of cardiac drugs. I'd seen this whole routine before, and while I was punishing his rib cage I wasn't hopefull all our efforts were going to amount to anything except another dead guy, full of drugs and broken ribs.
So, you can imagine my reaction when after the second shock, homeboy started struggling and grunting I was like "Sweet Lord, it's a fucking miracle!"
We got him to the hospital, and he wasn't just alive he was awake. At one point, we were talking to him like we always do, saying things like "Just relax, we are taking you to the hospital, you're going to be ok," He managed to whisper in a very Sam Elliot manner "I'll take your word for it."
When we dropped him off at the hospital and started gathering our stuff, I realized that I don't think I've ever felt that way before.
It's hard to describe, especially when I'm trying to avoid sounding like some kind of touchy, feely hippy. Basically the only thing I can compare it to was Iraq, when we got into intense situations over there I had the same kind of rush, but I always came away from it so angry, full of resentment, and just mad at the world. This was the same kind of rush, but I felt so happy, and so positive, and full of...love. Oh god, I'm a hippy.

Body for Life
It's going good. Tonight I came back full of so much pent up energy that I totally destroyed the HITT cardio routine. I ran about 2.5 miles in 20 minutes, and burned up around 400 calories. As I write this I can still feel my heart pounding. I'm feeling great. Looking forward to an awesome day tomorrow.