That Which Lurks Behind the Squat-Racks

So the other day I touched on subject that is very close to my heart, and that is: douchebags in the gym. Most of the time it's easy for me to ignore the guys who spend one minute lifting for every ten minutes posing and flexing in the mirrors. I'm not hating on them, a lot of them worked really hard to get in the kind of shape that warrants so much self-adoration. But the guys that really get me are the ones that I've come to call "the predators."

There was one guy in particular at my old gym that first earned the monicker that now applies to so many. I was going to the gym pretty regularly at the time, and this guy and I were on about the same schedule. I got to know his workout schedule just because he was around the same machines on any given day. Now he was in great shape, way better than me, and I could tell it came from hard work and consistency. The other consistent thing about this guy is that anytime an attractive woman came into the gym, he would completely abandon his workout routine in order to go use whatever machine happened to be within the line-of-sight of that girl.

I remember watching him do this one time, when some girl came in and went over to some useless piece of equipment that only women use because they think it will sculpt their thighs or something, and all of a sudden that dude was right there next to her, squeezing and sculpting away. That's a predator.

I don't know if he had a followup to this technique of gym-stalking. But I do know that I saw some obvious looks of discomfort on the faces of a few of his victims, and this was one example of many guys who made me hate "gym guys." The gym is bad enough for self-conscious guys, I can't imagine how much confidence it takes for a woman to get in there.

Now granted, there are some women who just live for this kind of attention, and god bless 'em, they get it. But there are a lot of women who do not go to the gym to get leered at, and I hate that sort of treatment might give women another good excuse not to work out.

I am so paranoid about being seen as a "gym guy," that whenever there is a woman in my vicinity at the gym I go out of my way not to notice them. If they're bent over doing dumb-bell rows on the bench next to me, I am sitting with my back to them waiting for them to finish and resume a stance, that couldn't be mistaken for provocative.

I don't know how these guys talk to women, the ladies that aren't there for attention all seem to have their guard up, and yet, still I see these guys approaching them. I'm a pretty gentlemanly sort, but this sort of thing has made me so paranoid I don't even say "excuse me" when I bump into a pretty girl in the gym. I just do the wide eyed, "uh" and quickly shuffle away.

So to all the pretty girls that come into the gym where I work out, that hate getting leered at, and hit on by all the dorks in baseball hats and wife-beaters. From me, and the rest of the non gym-guys: We are glad you are there, please keep coming to the gym. If you want to talk to us, we will be happy to make polite conversation and we promise not to stare down your shirt, or at your butt when you are just trying to get through a good workout. Thank you.